Opposites Attract......

So, I've been engaged for close to five months now.  Yeah, I kept it a secret from everyone except for maybe 10 people.  Then last weekend while CC and I were having a conversation, I suddenly realized that by keeping it a secret I was hurting his feelings a little.  He had told all of his family, friends and coworkers immediately.  But not me...just because I am very private and I don't like anyone knowing my personal business.  I realized that my keeping it a secret made him feel like I was ashamed of either him or being engaged.  And he definitely desereves better than that.  Once I thought about it like that, I realized that I certainly wouldn't want him to do that to me.  So, here I am telling the world that I am engaged. 

I never ever ever thought I'd get married again.  I really never wanted to get married again.  If after 16 years of marriage I couldn't make it work then I pretty much felt disqualified from the "game".  BUT...when I wasn't expecting it and certainly wasn't ready for it, I met this quirky country boy who is five years younger than me (gasp, I'm a cougar!).  I was married to someone who was ten years older than me...so being with someone five years younger was very hard to get used to (totally a mental thing)...even though CC is an old soul. Heck, he is more mature than me!  And he is definitely wiser than me.  I quite literally gave him HELL for months because I was a ridiculous disaster after my divorce.  He saw something in me that I sure didn't see in myself and he stuck it out.  Not only did he stick it out, he was the kindest, sweetest, most patient and understanding person I've ever met in my life.  He knew when to give me the best advice I've ever received and he knew when to just back off and let me have a meltdown.  He never judged me...not one time.  And most importantly, he always treated me like a princess.  How could I not fall in love with that?

He and I have nothing in common.  Not one thing.  To look at us, heck, we probably look like the most mismatched pair in the world.  We are!  So much so, in fact, that it is a running joke between us.  I never believed in soul mates and all that jazz.  I'm not a romantic person.  I'm not a lovey-dovey, touchy-feely, sappy person.  AT ALL.  I consider all that to be nonsense.   But when I met him, I swear I found my other half.  Would he have been my other half 10 years ago?  No.  I was supposed to be married to the man I married and live the life I lived.  I don't regret my marriage.  I gained a life-long friend and lived a good life and that life made me the person I am now.  And the person I am now was meant to find this country boy.  I'm not trying to sound romantic (I'm definitely not that girl) or philosophical, but I feel like everything I did in my life was leading me to find the person that truly is the other half of me.  He is Wal-Mart camo to my Kate Spade (literally, haha)...but it totally works. 

Even though I was raised in the country and have a dad that hunts and traps and kills everything and is the biggest outdoorsman there is, it was still hard for me to adapt to a man that lives to hunt and trap.  I was a serious vegetarian and an animal rights girl for 20+ years.  But I'm typing this blog right now in a room with a couple of deer, two big fish, some kind of bird, a bobcat and a squirrel staring at me (and there are countless other "trophies" in the closet not on display).  Did that take some getting used to?  Hell yes!  And I still don't like it.  But you know what?  I'm rolling with it.  I'm sure he doesn't like a bathroom and bedroom filled with my make-up and skincare "trophies".  We agreed to confine all of his "trophies" to one room and the rest of the place is mine.  Except for the camo recliner in the living room (insert eye roll).

We don't fight.  We never really have.  We have had a few disagreements, like every couple, but we are basically in sync all the time (nauseating, huh).  Except for that time he cooked a turtle in my crockpot when I wasn't here.  And that time I caught him skinning a rabbit in the kitchen sink.  And just this morning when I got out of bed and came staggering through the apartment in a daze...no glasses on yet, lines from my CPAP embedded in my face and a severe chemical burn on the skin of my face from my latest skincare experiment (yeah, I'm totally sexy), I hear "good morning dear but don't look over here".  Ummmmm, yeah, that meant I was most definitely going to look.  I grabbed my glasses and whipped my head around just in time to see a feather falling off his clothes and landing on the rug in front of the kitchen sink.  So he knows he's caught and explains that I shouldn't look because he is cutting up a goose he killed in the kitchen sink.  A goose!  He made sure to explain that he actually skinned it (or whatever you do to a goose) outside and he was just cutting up the meat.  Ummmm.....yeah....we are opposites.  And is he going to eat goose meat?  Well, probably seeing as how it is bagged up and sitting in a bowl inside the fridge as we speak.  I've learned not to ask too many questions as I always fear the answers...I just get out my bleach and disinfect everything from the faucets to the floors. 

Years ago, I had the worst temper and would blow up over the smallest of things.  I most certainly would not have stood for a man tracking through the house in muddy muck boots.  But I am not that person anymore and he is the reason.  He doesn't get upset about anything.  Ever.  He doesn't get mad.  He doesn't get depressed.  He doesn't stress out.  He just rolls with life.  It is so nice to have someone tell you constantly that "everything is going to be okay" and mean it.  He lives everyday to the fullest and thinks of everything as an adventure.  He has taught me to just roll with it...no matter what "it" is.  And I do.  And guess what?  It makes life so much greater!  Even though I'm constantly disinfecting something...

It is great to be with someone that I don't have to pretend for.  He runs races and lifts weights all the time and is 15% body fat (literally) and he eats fish and vegetables everyday.  I, on the other hand, am 86% body fat (I hope not literally) and live off of junk food.  He knows I'm a loose cannon.  He knows I am going to know the words to every song that comes on TV or the radio, no matter the genre or how old it is, and I'm going to sing it like I'm live on stage...even in public.   He knows that even though I am the girliest of girls and a lover of all things make-up, I'm most likely going to be the bum in Wal-Mart who fits the stereotype.  He knows I'm going to skip showering one day of the weekend because I can't tear myself away from the television.  He knows that I have the sense of humor of a 12 year old boy and think bodily functions are the funniest part of life.  And he loves me.  And for that I thank God.  Because even though I would have never went out looking for a country boy who lives life at a slow pace and loves yard sales and flea markets and killing things, God knew that is exactly what I needed.  And I'm a better Amy for it. 

I always told CC not to ask me to marry him.  And I joked with him that if he ever did it would have to be some grand gesture before I'd even consider saying yes.  But last September on his birthday as soon as he got home from work and with me already walking around in my ugly pajamas, he dropped to one knee wearing his dirty work uniform in our kitchen floor and asked me to marry him.  He said it was his birthday and he knew the only thing he wanted for his birthday and everyday for the rest of his life was me.  And this girl?  Well she was shaking and crying and she said yes.  Because she realized that she didn't need a grand gesture.  Or a prince.  All she needed was a quiet country boy who speaks from his heart, loves her unconditionally and treats her like a princess. 

The end.  :)